When I think about your soon to be absence in my life, I wonder: Will life ever be so sweet again? I shall cherish the memory of your whispered promises of comfort and pleasure. Who knew you would be such a loyal companion, always waiting for me to passively entertain your presence. Your enchantments linger and I so frequently look for you, able to find your presence wherever I go, you call out to me, and I wait for your permission to be self-indulgent. You are effective, consistent, and offer yourself freely to me without constraints. You bring excitement, and allure, you help me through the darkest of times and I can always count on you to deliver some new form of yourself for me to experiment. You are an adventure with unending and unexplored jungles of exotic varieties.
For the next 6 weeks we will part ways, in part, because not mentioned in your chocolate glazed promises are the consequences of your presence in my life: the headaches, mood swings, the sugar highs and of course the resulting lows, the weight gain and the frequent need to find ways to incorporate you into my life. You are a little controlling, a little too demanding, and at times a bit too intrusive in my life. It’s time to rethink this relationship, to disentangle this web of deceit, and to make new friends.
Since every year the average American consumes at least 50 pounds of sugar a year, I doubt you will miss me, but for now, I will miss you and maybe one day I’ll be free of my dependency on you. You are not god, but a chemical, but I often treat you as the former while dismissing the latter.